I have been in Australia for two days now (arrived evening of the 2nd Feb)

I am suffering from jet lag - sleeping neither on South African time nor Australian time, more like Indian Ocean time. First day I woke up at 2am and that was it - wide awake into the new day, taking pics in the paddocks at dawn.  By 3pm I was trashed and fell asleep in 38 degrees heat for about 4 hours, which really messed up my evening sleep. Only fell asleep at 5am this morning!!! and then woke up at 11am!!!!!!!  Just in time to stumble into the Borah Basher (Turkey to take off vehicle) and get my ass up the mountain.

No big flying for me at present - yesterday bumbled around for an hour, enjoying a superb low save on the west side, getting up again and flying back over to the east side to land at Godfrey's ranch.  Others flew 60 - 80kms towards Narrabri, Bingara and triangles in the opposite direction towards the lakes and Manilla, so a good day missed by me due to nervous tension re possible over development, no cellphone for this area, nor retrieve.

Today I decided to  try my hand at cross country as it looked fantastic.  I was having a really nice and easy flight  with the hangies before I went off and did my own thing for an hour, only to succumbed to the Tarpoly Sink Hole just 14kms out.  You only hear about these known sink holes later :-( But it was an enjoyable flight, so I am happy, sort of :-)  Others are reporting hectic air experiences, including the hang glider pilots who gave me a lift back to Manilla, but maybe I am jet lag sleeping through it :-)

There is an international hang glider competition here this week.  One hangie from Russia fell over a thermal and broke up mid air, throwing reserve.  The  others report wide awake attention to flying, with Hans Bausenwein experiencing a horseshoe with his gliders wingtips clapping handies in front of him yesterday :-)  There are about 55 hang glider pilots and it really is fun flying with them with around 30 paraglider pilots marking thermals. Interesting waiting for a thermal on take off and observing they way they watch the paraglider pilots who are already in the air.  Hunched over in their harnesses, with their wings above them, waiting on the lip of the mountain like predatory hawks ready to launch a strike when they see one of us rock back into a thermal.

Why are hang glider pilots as a whole, so much more good looking than paraglider pilots?????  Sigh, enjoying the window shopping :-)))

Such interesting Australian people I meet along the way eg. Like the Lindt Chocolate Sales Lady whose husband the Hairdresser is also a Wild Boar Hunter (just remember that next time you go get your hair clipped and coiffeured) and Kylie the Lady Rodeo Rider who gave me lift from Manilla to Godfrey's .....  Such colourful, friendly people!

They say you can spot an accident waiting to happen.  Horrible judgement saying, but today we watched a pilot take off who was very heavy on his breaks immediately his feet left launch. Someone shouted for him to lift his breaks up, which he did not hear because he promptly pulled them down more as he grabbed both carabiners low and push his bum into the harness.  The thermals were strong but with wide apart cycles. Still, I could not help but feel dread on his behalf, but he survived the take off.

The day was going to take its toll though and the pilot (name withheld) was not going to get away with it a second time. I watched a few minutes later as the young New Zealander smacked himself and his red Gin Rebel into a tree to the left of and below West take off.  I was flying above him at the time, thermalling just above ridge height when he came under me and initiated a sharp 360 degree turn with radical inside weight shift. He was never going to make the turn and he was below ridge height.  A serious error in judgement.

Fortunately it was trees he piled into and not the boulders that litter the area.  At first I could not see movement. He was probably in shock or assessing his physical damage, but as people started running down to help, he lifted his left leg and an arm, trying to free himself of the branches and lines. He managed to walk up the hill himself, but an ambulance took him to hospital to check his ankle and he complained of back pain once the adrenalin started wearing off.  Hopefully he will be sore but ok.  His glider is still up there.  Pilots tried to get it down but it encompassed two trees and was hard going in the heat which is 35-39 degrees every day since I have been here.  Going up early tomorrow morning with Alex Raymont from Canada to try and free it.

The hangie comp had its fair share of mishaps today as well.  Two apparently elderly pilots messed up their launches and stalled.  Fortunately news is that all walked away with nothing too serious - knee, and faces, one with perhaps concussion. At least one of them went for a hospital check up.  If that is all they suffered, they are very lucky indeed.  One of the Dutch pilots the same age, witnessing all this, packed up his glider and hitched a lift down. Accidents on take off are one of the reasons I prefer to launch early.  It is demotivating to watch such carnage.

But taking off early meant bomb outs today. Hans was the first to get away, but apparently got sucked down not so long afterwards. I got up easily and followed, not knowing his fate and wanting some of that distance he has been enjoying the past few days and also ended up flying for only 7kms. Without anyone to gaggle with (know one else got away for a long time)and without a plan, I paid the price for just aimless wandering and ended up hiking out for 7kms in fierce heat.  Everything I touched felt it was about to combust.  Not enjoying flying without designated retrieve....and not a single car was going my way.  Yes, I am feeling down about my lack of flying distance.  Time to consult the Mind Map.

Clause is flying well every day and should do well in the XC Open.  He waited three hours after me before taking off and flew with the hang gliders to Bingara which was their Goal.  It is wonderful to see paragliders and hangliders thermalling and flying together and I had 7kms of walking in which to observe this beautiful spectacle. I need to learn how to gaggle fly.  It looks like a lot more fun.

As evening came and the air cooled off a touch, a few of us went up for a sunset flight.  New arrival Mark Graham included.  Of course it was Bob's student and a low air time pilot who stayed up the longest....sigh.

As darkeness came I helped Gina in the vineyards fixing nets that protect the fruit from the birds.  We did it by moonlight and I laughed at my  moonlight shadows and the kangaroos peering from the rows :-)  Working in the evening was lovely - the day is just too hot for outside work.  Then the Dutch pilots invited me to a chili con carne dinner and salad which they cooked themselves.  Very tasty and I was famished!!

Oh, the vineyards belong to Godfrey.  He makes a lovely Shiraz under the label -  Eagle Mountain.

I am going to start by saying that it was a good day for some.  The Swiss Young Bloods are on form for instance, flying 60-90kms or so in the Bingara direction - Sebastien, Urs and Dominique are on a mission - gaggle flying well, as the Swiss do.

And then there is me.  How is it possible to get such a great climb out - every day - and not get the consecutive climbs which translate into distance?

My launch timing is perfect.  I take the thermal and stay with it over the back of launch, eking out every drop of rising air ( a slow process).  I pass through a sheer turbulent layer at 1800m and I am beautifully set for great expectations of a long flight. Today is going to be different.  Today - Barraba!  For starters.

And then I hear the dreaded sink drone.  On previous days I favoured the flats. No big surprise there, but today I concentrated on staying on that ridge and flew North with Andreas Borgnes from Norway on his Skywalk Poison 2.  So why was I to enduring this ongoing lament from both Andreas and my Flytec that there was no lift?  It should be working on the ridge. And yes, I know there was no lift at present thank you very much!  I was leading and making the evidence of sink all very clear to everyone.  Eventually Andreas announced he was turning back towards launch where we last experienced lift  and I soldiered on alone.  I did not think I would make it back to launch having seen other pilots sink out trying to do the same.  And I was not landing at Turkey!

So I broke my plan for the day - to gaggle fly.  I had promised myself that I was going to try gaggle flying for a change and when push came to shove, I did not last 10 minutes!   Going back just seems wrong to me.  But Andreas knew what he was doing and I was being stubborn. There must be lift out there eventually....surely...oh hell.  And so I turn out for the flats and hope for a miracle.  I am still on the west side coming up to a shallow constriction with a river bed and low hills and still going down.  The air starts to promise all sorts of dreams and wonders of getting up, but I am shy to follow the sirens over the hill where there is a sprinkling of trees and undulating land.  I am now sucking the ground like a camel at a watering hole.  I want to land and don't even try to do something with the bumps.  It would seem that once I come to decision and embark on a course of action, I struggle to undo it.  I am lacking in flexible thought.  I am not grabbing opportunities on offer.

Each day the Universe offers me a low save and each day I decline.  This is not me.  Why am I doing this?

For another 5km hike that followed an hours wait in 39 degree heat under a tree watching others (including Andreas) fly over, followed by a lift in kindly John Cochranes truck?  I don't think so.   Thank goodness for the hangies giving my a lift up the hill.  Garbo made me promise not to tell that he had paragliders in his vehicle.  His mates would never let him live it down :-)  And what a well stocked cooler of drinks he has!!!

And what does Garbo mean in Australian?  Garbage Collector.  Hmmmm...  And that is his real name too!!!  I am sure his Mom really named him after Greta Garbo, but thought her son might not make it through the Australian kindergarten if she called him Greta..... Thoughtful Sheila... And Rob Larken, ex South African hangie - his driver gave me a lift back to Godfrey's from launch when it was apparent that taking off again at 5pm might mean another even longer hike out with no retrieve.....  Very friendly and helpful people, the Ozzie's.

Last day of the hangie competition tomorrow.  Real marathon of a task today!  I think only 3 or 4 out of around 55 pilots made goal at Godfrey's with the last leg being into wind.  Unfortunately many did not get further than the paddock below launch. Long no wind lulls between thermals on launch slowed things up and then big sink between lift dragged many down.  A few photos later.  It is after midnight here and I don't want to mess up my new sleeping pattern.

Many pilots around me flying around 100kms every day and then there are those like me not getting away. Demoralising.  Have to turn this around or take up sight seeing...

Hang Glider Competition - Last day:
Mixed fortunes for the hang gliders on their last day of their competition.  Some got away and flew the task, but the no wind take offs claimed two or three.  I hear rumour of a failed west take off, but definitely there was tree snagging on South and East take offs whilst I was on launch and another went in at the emergency landing that I and Andre from Pro-Air in the Netherlands visted earlier, but in our case, no damage.  One pilot is having his collar bone checked out and one broke his arm. Don't know the fate of the others.

Got to meet Rob Larkin, a hang glider pilot on launch.  The Aussies still refer to him as the South African, even though he has been living here for 30 YEARS!

Today I enjoyed a rest day.  Most pilots did not get away anyway because of strong wind on launch - although Burki was one of those that did :-)

Nina (Burki's wife), Claus Vischer and I went to the local Manilla river for a swim.  Claus showed us a place upstream of the weir by the Rivergums Caravan Park where it was deep enough so only our heads were above the chocolate brown water.  In 40 degree heat is was wonderful!!!  We swam up river until we found a colony of fruit or fox bats hanging from some trees over the river.  They seem to favour the Australian pine type trees over the eucalyptus and are very social, squabbling over crowded branches and climbing over one another, screeching like parrots.  It was enchanting to hold onto a fallen branch in the stream and look up at their cute little foxy faces and golden brown fur, quizzical beady eyes looking back down at us only 3 or 4 meters below.  All the while they would be holding on with their feet, fanning themselves before wrapping up their little bodies in parchment type wings, looking like upside down ice cream cones.

When they climbed over one another or up the branches, hand over hand, I could see where the horror movies found their inspiration in turning these beautiful creatures into 'evil blood sucking horrors'.  It was fascinating to watch their determined hand over hand methodical movements with spiky bits from their wings sticking out behind them and it was in this moment that I was glad their wingspan was only about one and a half feet across, their bodies small enough to fit in two open cupped hands.  I hope to revisit and take pictures...

This evening Claus helped me free a bird and a kangaroo from the nets that protect the vines.  It was almost full moon as Gina and I repaired the holes and fixed the draping nets over the vines.  It is quite relaxing working in the cool of the evening and very pleasant.  Janine Krauchi from Rainbow Beach arrived tonight, so we now have three women sharing a room at Godfrey's house. Good company.

Tomorrow I take another rest day and drop Gina off at the airport for a brief trip to Sydney.  I will take the opportunity to wander around Tamworth, do a bit of shopping and hopefully I will be energised for flying on Tuesday again.  Although I am struggling with my flying, I am enjoying the the life on the ranch, the wild life enchanting.  So many different coloured birds and I even had a 25 year old kangaroo hisss at me and back me away from a wee wee tree!  The horses in the area are incredibly proud, beautiful and friendly and preying mantis have an unusual fondness for me.  Whenever I land, one would appear on my glider and stalk towards me, eyes upturned and very determined and almost communicative.  Not sure what they find so fascinating, but it is incredible how 'human' they appear.  I have yet to fly with the eagles, but I have seen plenty of these majestic birds thermalling near my out landings....

Life in rural Australia.....

'Ignore the fuel indicator reading on empty - it is broken.  Look at the speedometer and when it comes close to 200km you fill up and set again to nought'.

Gina giving me instructions as I drive her to the airport. We are in a beat up old Holden that Godfrey allows those who stay on the farm to make use of.  Famous last words.  Five minutes after saying goodbye to my German room mate, the car starts to jerk and shudder...and stop.  The speedometer reads 146kms.  I should have enough fuel.  I turn the key of the automatic again and the car roars into life and we move along..another few meters ...and stop.  It is hot.  40 degrees.  No air conditioning.  No wind.  I start the car and again we chug along for a few meters before I pull on to the side of the road again.  I keep doing this until I near some buildings, but see no fuel station anywhere.  I get out and cross the road seeking directions to the nearest fuel station in this industrial area near the airport.

Simon is a nice bloke and comes over to have a look at the car.  Suggests that there is a fuel blockage (probably right), but I think that maybe the speedometer is wrong and I am out of fuel.  I ask where the nearest station is and he gives direction - 4kms away.  I look at him.  I don't want to ask for help, but lately I have been walking a lot in fierce heat and hope he offers to give me a lift.  He does not.  Survival instincts get me to keep him talking until I get the response I want - an offer of a lift.  Why can't I just ask straight out? 

He eventually offers to syphon from his Ute - bakkie - pick-up.  Somehow I manage to get the car across the busy road without coming to a stop in the middle and causing an accident, but the syphoning does not work.  Not enough height difference he says.  I look at him.  His work colleagues come out and chat and I mention Godfrey's name hoping this works in my favour and the guy who looks like management (he is wearing long pants whilst everyone else in Australian outback seems to wear shorts) says, 'Yeah, I know Godfrey.'  I start chatting about the paragliding competitions with the blokes coming out of the building and Simon now offers to clear it with his boss and take me to the fuel station in his Ute.  Thank Goodness!!!  I know it is manipulative, but I had to establish rapport with these guys if I was going to get the help I needed.  I just could not face another walk ... especially on a day when I had a car!

We put in 5 litres and off I go, happy that the problem has been solved.  I do my errands for the farm and pick up some mechanical bits to repair the glider trailer and shopping for myself, the house and some of the cabin pilots.  I buy ice to keep the milk and chocolate cool as I leave Tamworth.  Ten kilometers out of Tamworh the car starts to jerk and slowly, inevitably, the car and I come to a halt alongside the road.  I phone Bob to ask him if there is a mechanic he knows back in Tamworth that will look at the car after 5pm.  None.  I tell him I will continue to Manilla slowly and to let know Elizabeth (Godfrey's Mom)  that I will be late. 

The next 35kms takes two and a half hours.  I don't get upset or frustrated.  I have a book and relax. The Holden and I drive for a few kilometers and stop.  I read beside the road.  A couple stop and offer a me lift to Manilla - leaving the car. I can't abandon the vehicle beside the road. I ask if we can tow and they say no.  It is too hot and their Ute is likely to overheat.  I decline.  I know that I can get the car back. It will just take time. The lady thoughtfully gives me a bottle of iced water which I gratefully accept.  Just about everyone seems to carry a well stocked esky in the back of the Utes out here in Rural Australia.

I make it to Attuna (spell)?  A Bar/Hotel beside the road and see a couple of workmen's Utes outside.  I go in and ask if there are any patrons who happen to be mechanics and could have a look at my car.  They laugh saying they are all bush mechanics.  A furniture removal man by the name of David offers to have a look.  He is wearing really short shorts. Almost as short as mine, and a day-glo green protective reflective bib over his shirt.  Grateful I follow him as he weaves his way out the door and puts his beer down ever so carefully.  David tinkers with the fuel line, then scrapes the build up on the points under the distributor cap whilst his Postman buddy looks on helpfully whilst drinking his own beer and David pronounces it fixed as the car roars into life.  I offer to buy him another beer, but he refuses, happy to help.  Friendly people the Aussies.

Ten kilometers on I am happy and relieved and the car is still going strong and I allow myself to feel relief.  Immediately, and I do mean immediatley, the car starts to shudder again.  Oh no!  I can't even go cross country in a motor car!!!

Received this email tonight.   Manilla, Australian time is 9 hours ahead of South Africa.

I have kept the writer's name private:

Hiya Gaynor

I read your latest blog, and your closing sentence made me think. I’m sure you are well aware of where I’m going with this, so please forgive me if I’m pointing out a fact that you have looked at hundreds of times..:-)

Oh no!  I can't even go cross country in a motor car!!!

The thing I have become very aware of recently, is that your reality is amazingly controlled in many respects by all kinds of messages and suggestions, subliminal and otherwise, that it receives.  I know from reading previous posts that you fly best when relaxed and happy, and under no stress or anxiety, both from a safety and performance point of view. When you were flying so many miles, you were positive and happy, and your subconscious was constantly re-affirming to your conscious mind that you were ‘in the zone’ and able to fly XC. That ultimately shaped what became your reality.

I really have no doubt that have the ability on any day to take off and fly far, but even in a light-hearted comment on your blog about not being able to do XC in a car, your subconscious is being fed with the ammo to feed you conscious,  and your reality, that XC is going out of reach.

Please forgive me if I’m telling you things you know, but I couldn't’t help notice that.

Every part of your day, to the extent of writing stuff on your mirror to see first thing in the morning, ( as I know many top sports people do) should be geared toward reaffirming what you CAN do, and that’s fly XC. You know you can. You’ve been there before. Just start to believe again, and never, never entertain even the slightest negative. Even a joke on your blog.

Go Fly.

Flygirls response:

Every day, in the past two months I have come to realise how incredibly fortunate I am.  To have a loving family, my Gran, my Mother and Father, Sister, Nieces and Nephew.  I have never taken the time to understand relationships - not family, friendship or boyfriends and kept to myself much of my 43 years - an island with a rickety and precarious wooden bridge barely connecting me to the Mainland.

Recently I decided to start work on that wooden bridge, and I dedicated 2009 to learning about relationships - about what it is to have friends and to be a friend ... to allow the love of parents in and to be a loving daughter in return.

Paragliding changed my life in 2001.  It gave me Life, Freedom and incredible Joy.

In recent years I have struggled, but every day, paragliding still teaches me about Myself and about People.  My most recent juncture started with my loss of passion for flying in December 2007 which was replaced by the love of my Sisters Children followed by acceptance and unconditional love from my Parents, something which I have craved my whole Life.  I never thought this eventuality would come to pass, but towards the latter part of 2008, it did. I could label it a Miracle, but that would deny the Love that exists between my Mother, my Father and Myself.  If there was another name for Miracle, it would be Love.

Here in Australia, I am surrounded by happy, loving people.  The XC Open is my second family and I delight in meeting up with my flying friends from previous competitions.  It is in this positive environment that I have consciously placed myself, for I am influenced by my environment and what better place for me to be ..... surrounded by happy people who just want to fly free, as far as they can, delighting in their own achievements and being happy for those around them achieving their own Personal Bests.  The XC Open competition is unlike any other.  It is about flying for yourself, about realising your Personal Best, with 100-150 other pilots all doing the same ... united by a common energy.

Through all this, the Internet serves to keep me in touch with people in South Africa and the rest of the World and when I receive an email from home like the one above, I realise that there are people on the other side of that bridge who are also building and fixing those rickety wooden beams, and no matter the expanse of water this bridge must cross, knowing that there are other people out there helping me to find my way home - where ever home may be, brings tears to my eyes .. and courage to my heart.

They say Red Bull gives you wings .... It is my discovery that it is People who help free my wings from within...

A number of pilots tested their cloudsuck and windspeed armory today.

Jumbo on his new green GIN Boomer 5, an upgrade from his GIN Boomer Sport.  After a lengthy fight into wind over take off he ended up going over the back and flying to Manilla to land in the flats.  Trying to get down over Manilla under a big sucking cloud was difficult.  He was stuck at 1000m ASL engaging big ears and full speed bar alternating with a spiral and wingovers.  1ms down, +1ms up, 0, -1ms and so on.  He landed safely to be picked up by Tom and Vic from the Royal Hotel (that's service!), were he sucked down beer and multiple G&Tś.  Jumbo is very happy to report that his GIN Boomer 5 behaved well on his first mini-siv flight on this glider.

Another Polish pilot, Henry Zjawin, a man of steel nerves, was also flying a GIN Boomer 5, pale blue in colour, taking a series of very big collapses that had us oohing and aahing from the safety of launch.

Yet another Polish pilot, Kacper also flew to Manilla, about 15 kms.

A few other pilots took off and flew earlier, but most of us drove down again, happy with our decision to remain grounded in the face of strong wind on launch and CuNim's building everywhere.